Africa's Looking Good Right About Now
I'm a little late with a reaction piece to the US presidential election, but as Africans never say... at least I showed up.
I'm still processing how I should react to the results.
Should I start with laughter or is it too soon and too callous?
Should I begin by stating the obvious, that I am shocked?
Or should I begin by welcoming America as the 55th African country?
I know many are still wondering how this could happen. Even Africans who are experts in election rigging and somewhat undemocratic practices are shocked at how someone can achieve such results with free and fair elections.
We're going to need a tutorial on how to do that, by the way.
But that's neither here nor there. As always I have found the answer to the question that is being asked.
What is going on with the world?
It's really simple. The U.K and now America have seen how much fun African countries are having and they want in on it.
Brexit was a sign that times were changing. We gave America the benefit of the doubt and thought there was no way they could elect a man so vilified by not only the media but a lot of people around the world. But as always, America couldn't let us have all the fun.
They've seen the special treatment we get. It was only a matter of time before they figured out that Third World living is good.
People automatically assume your country is bound to be messed up. So it doesn't matter what kind of president you have because nobody really cares and it doesn't affect them.
Corruption is not that big of a deal, it's an expected. What sort of country are you if your leaders are not involved in a corruption scandal and still hold office?
Obviously, your army is not the best since you can't invade or protect other countries. Especially since some countries are so rude and don't even say thank you for your efforts.
Who could forget the ideas of divide and conquer from colonialism?
If you don't divide the people based on their ethnicities or political affiliations then really what is the point of being a leader?
Leaders of the free world, I see through all your tricks and I encourage you to turn back. This road is not for everyone.
While I admit it is fun being a part of the countries tha no one really cares about.
You are forcing us to step up and lead.
As Africans we are sheep. We like to watch and see what you're doing so we can be just like you.
Now if you follow the sheep, are you not a sheep yourself?
And if you're the sheep, who is the shepherd?
We could be a world of sheep but you know you're not qualified for that America and Britain.
Come on, you have not only used your wealth and resources but our wealth and resources to build empires.
You couldn't even do the elections correctly. As someone explained to me, the election was between a corrupt leader or an ignorant one. In Africa, we get a two for one deal, corruption AND ignorance.
You gave your people a choice between two evils. You are clearly not suited for this life.
Most importantly this may be the moment when many people realize that America is not the sun and we other countries do not revolve around you. I'm not sure you're ready for a world like that.
We're not ready for a world like that. We thought we would have time to get our act together.
Africans I know this is tough because we like to copy but i've figure out a solution. America just ditched the status quo and if they did it so can we! Let's copy them and ditch the status quo and vote differently. According to many (just Trevor Noah), Trump is just like an African leader. We've already had many Trumps, so we don't need to go down that road again. Since they want to join the party, it's time to ditch it and find our own thing.
But in the meantime America, the African Union meets randomly during the year to waste fund and discuss ways to make their citizens lives "better". Please try not to attend.